Sitting to write about distraction this week, I find myself, (unsurprisingly) distracted!
I love the irony there. In fact, I can’t believe today is really Thursday, because it seems like yesterday was Sunday... of last week.
I love life, most days— Some days life and I have a reconcilable understanding to leave each other alone for awhile... But most days it’s a full on romp!
I have always been someone very focused... I think because my childhood was so painfully boring; I had no choice.
As I’ve gotten older, I find I am much more easily distracted; probably because I am now never bored, as I have children. And those children are incredibly different, and all want to do fifteen different things at once... I feel distracted just writing this!
Yet, even with additional distractions, thankfully, I have learned how to focus my mind... and tune in.
One cardinal rule I have, and keep with all of my guys (everyone really) is to stop, shut everything off for those few moments, and be laser sharp in our conversation. I want to hear, and understand, every word; otherwise, “I told you I was spending $100.00 on that (whatever... fill in the blank)... I told you they were shaving the dog, or their hair... I told you we were all going to eat your Chinese leftovers for breakfast...”
I hope someone can relate!
Okay, these are small things. But I never want them to become the big things that I didn’t hear said; or worse, didn’t notice things that weren’t said, but someone hoped I would. I really don’t want to be having a virtual conversation into a tiny rectangular light with someone in India, while my children are within easy reach, and trying to shout words down the black holes of my soundless ears.
I have been guilty of this very thing! Anyone who has ever tried resolving a computer crisis by utilizing tech support with children in mid-dispute may get this!
So... finally! For the purpose of this writing... for such a time as this... I can finally put to use my photo essay, of bug... porn?
Please bear with! I am not completely weird... We were having a Fourth of July picnic ... kids running around, a million conversations at once. I must have gotten tired, so I sat down at a nearby table.
To my delight, a beautiful winged insect lighted on the table in front of me. She looked as tired as I felt. I took out my camera to capture her beauty... her solitude.
As I admired her... her male counterpart landed beside her. (This was a serendipitous moment!) He then proceeded to mount her. I looked away politely, but had to look back when I could not help but watch her rip his leg off and throw it to the side!
Though now missing one appendage... he was undeterred! The show must go on, as they say...
But... please know; these tiny beings were so passionate... so purposeful... so intimately focused... even me with my lens; my running children; my husband brandishing his spatula, wearing his red, white, and blue chef’s apron, asking how we wanted our burgers; their obvious exhaustion, and permanent maming injuries...could not distract!
Damn... how do you get THERE?
A friend of mine recently posted a great pic of a brain, complete with brain stem, spinal cord, attached nerves, eye stems, and eyeballs. (Thank you Leigh!)
The caption read something paraphrased to the effect of this being the essence of who we truly are... an alien being, wandering on this planet in space suits.
I loved it!! Isn’t that so true? While yes, some function incredibly well without the natural use of traditional eyes... I cannot speak from that experience. In respect to eyes, I can only relate with my own limited point of view. I can; however, relate to being this visceral arthropod... moving along, absorbing, analyzing, constantly sifting through data/stimuli at a staggering pace... making split second decisions in rapid fire sequence... and that’s just getting through getting ready to go out the front door with family in tow.
This makes me love even more my new spirit animal... the octopus!
Seriously... I am in love! And thank you Sy Montgomery for introducing me to my new, exquisite friend. Honestly, reading The Soul of an Octopus changed my life. I will always be grateful Ms. Montgomery, for your introducing me to a new zip code, of which I now long to be a part!
The octopus... soft, sensoral being. Intelligent beyond our awares; exponential strength( I believe each SUCKER can lift something crazy, like approximately 35lbs); tastes and feels through its skin; highly observant and communicative; ridiculously able to pour itself into places times under its actual size ( it only has to be able to fit its beak); intelligent enough to hide itself from danger, yet a fierce fighter if need be; thrives in its natural undersea habitat, yet able to successfully emerge, and briefly, purposefully travel along mostly dry ground for brief periods of time; mothers devote themselves solely to their young; and my favorite, favorite part... it can rapid camouflage itself to fit a constantly changing undersea background...
Without exaggeration... My wriggly friend can go from pink stripes, to brown splotches with raised papillae, to cold grey, and back again in seconds!
I ... am an octopus. Well, truth told... I wish to be an octopus. I believe they handle all this change slightly better than I do!
Yet, this is my desire! To handle rapid change, both within and around myself, with seamless ease.
Work in constant progress...
So... ways to refocus and stay sane in change:
- Pray/Meditate (yess!!)
- Vision Boards ( Thank you Jazmyne!!)
- Be quiet
- Lights/Tech off!!
- Teach my children to Pray/Meditate
- Walk in the forest
- Sit near an ocean
- Drive a long, smooth road
- Salt caves
- Sit under a tree
- Lie or sit on grassy soil
- Pet an animal
- Listen to crickets
- Be present when a crow murder finds its nightly roost!
- Play an instrument
- Wash dishes ( Has to be in front of a window... warm sudsy water... maybe I just like to soak my hands?... no dishes needed!)... Hope calls this a “Mom Spa”!
- Reflect on success (no matter how seemingly small!)
- Walk in gratitude
As I end this week, I will reflect... I will focus my point.
I am able to be here, writing my heart, with incredible women who also share pieces of themselves...
I Am able to write at all...
My family is alive... for that I am so incredibly thankful!
My husband is well, and wonderfully supportive... I was not always in a relationship where I could say that... I will appreciate that for all its worth while I can...
I live in a country where I can still write freely...
I made it to Thursday!
I will see the Sea of distraction as my medium in which to swim to the island of focus... to sit for a moment... regroup... and be strengthened to dive back in!
Life is actually a really great gift... one big box, full of so many little boxes and bags! Or maybe we are just like a cage of bright bouncy balls... once tipped, or jostled... all that energy just starts to toggle everywhere!
I choose to focus, and tune into each moment as I open each little surprise inside; even if a few of those surprises at first, seem like ugly sweaters.
I am so grateful!
Now, I am off to the fray!
Please Wish me well,
As I do you!
Much, Much love;